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Nurture any new relationship

We all think that finding a new job is a logical, dispassionate affair. That the new employer will respect us if we take our time, if we don't get too carried away, if we make them wait a bit before we finally decide to say yes.I have often likened the process of finding a new job to dating. And what you say in the early days really sets the tone for the relationship going forward. So think about this carefully. Whilst you can never lie, you might just one question whether you should be completely honest the whole time. Ask yourself whether your desire to keep the new employer at arms length is compatible with their desire to sort this job out as quickly as possible. Do they prefer someone who is logical to somebody who is really keen to join? Giving good, positive buying signals is much more important than telling them you still have a choice, you won't make your mind up yet, you have got other good opportunities to see. Even if they know you are not quite decided, the sensible candidate will politely buy some time, ask their partner and get back to the employer the next day. Or perhaps ask for a written offer and have some sensible questions that need answering. All of this can move the relationship along while you are waiting for the outcome of another meeting. And in all honesty if you do decide to join them, no one will be any the wiser nor think any the less of you.

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